Thursday, January 25, 2007

Getting alone

I wish I had something clever to post, but I don't. My mood remains mostly melancholy and right now I'm feeling as though I don't have too much to offer.

Job hunting is draining and makes you feel as though your worth is reduced to what you can fit on a piece of paper and what "marketable skills" you possess, and apparently juggling is not as marketable as I would have hoped. :) I feel like the black hole of employment, because it seems as though all things that have potential come within my gravitational pull and shrivel. Ha, maybe it's not that bad. ;) But it is pretty pitiful. I think I've put my resume into at least 8 places and I haven't heard a peep. Not a peep! Humph. Please pray for a peep. :)

Of course this is all built on the foundation of still feeling crummy about the whole not going back to Brazil thing. I was hoping in choosing not to go back, God would reaffirm my decision with all kinds of things falling perfectly into place, but that has not been the case at all. God and I are becoming re-acquainted, when I didn't even realize we'd drifted apart. If nothing else I'm realizing that I need to take some time to refocus and rededicate myself to God and his service.

The spiritual thought wrapping around me lately is that of getting alone with God. I read My Utmost for His Highest every day, and this is something that Chambers writes about fairly often. I'm a strong believer in the importance of community, but there is a time for growing intimacy with the Father. I don't know how to explain it better than Chambers did in the linked devotional, so check it out. That's what I'm seeking right now.

I'm reading two great books-- What's So Amazing About Grace by Yancey and Irresistible Revolution by Claibourne. They are exactly what I need at this moment of my life, and I highly recommend them to everyone.

In musically happy news, American Idol has restarted and Tuesday I was very pleased with our two gems we found in Memphis. Derek Webb comes out with a CD at the end of the month and Elliott Yamin in March. Today I was reunited with my formerly lost U2 "Atomic Bomb" CD. So at least the world is musically right. :)

And because the blog needs some color, here's a nice random picture of some strange pickles from my mom's sandwich a few weeks ago.



They're looking at us!

6 comments:

Mark and Kelly said...

I would totally hire you as a juggler! Not the peep you were expecting, but it's all I can offer right now:)

Pamela said...

I'm praying for your job hunt! Love you friend!

Nina said...

What cute pickles! They seem a little camera shy - they've got that "deer in the headlights" look!

Whit said...

These two guys would fit right in with the peas from Veggie Tales.

Before I got the rockin' job that I have now, I got passed over for some jobs that I thought were perfect for me. I hated that feeling so much, and I hope that you won't let those kind of feelings stick around for too long. You are way talented, Ann, and some company will be blessed when they discover your gifts. Keep it up!

Leah said...

Oh my goodness--weird pickles are taking over the world. Visit two of the bloggers on my sidebar (Flat Nosed Pups and LMizzle)--they both posted about their weird pickles!!!!!

Alissa said...

I bit into a pickle that looked like that once. I interpreted the expression as one of betrayal, and I felt very bad.