2008 Sojies

The past two years I've written the "Sojie Awards"- how's that for self-aggrandizement? :) While filling it out this year, though, I realized I didn't like several of the questions, so I'm writing my own year end review using some of the old questions but also throwing in some new ones.

2008 Sojies!

HIGH POINT OF THE YEAR?
The trip to Honduras was such a magnificent and profound blessing. Paris was also perfect. :)

LOW POINT OF THE YEAR?
Ooooh my. Some fractured relationships were very painful this year.

LESSON LEARNED THIS YEAR?
You can't control how people act; you can only control how you react to them.

BEST HOLIDAY?
Hmm... I really am not sure. Fourth of July at IHOP was pretty great, although it had nothing to do with the holiday.

SONG FOR 2008?
"Divine Romance" by Phil Wickham

BEST MOVIE OF 2008?
I almost hate to type this because it makes me feel so... unlike me, but "Fireproof." There- I said it!

BEST BOOK OF 2008?
I didn't read nearly as much this year as I usually do, so this is hard. Honestly, I think the Bible. I read it a lot more and with fresher eyes than I ever have, and it's been life-changing.

BEST TV SHOW OF 2008?
Watch me buck the system and say "This American Life", the RADIO show on NPR hosted by Ira Glass. Truly, very few earthly things bring me greater pleasure than this show. Seriously- go to their favorite episodes page and listen to some of them. I suggest "The Legend of Bobby Dunbar" or "24 Hours at the Golden Apple" (the first one I heard) to get a feel for what TAL is all about. Ooh, or "The Break-up"! I could nerd-lovishly babble forever, so I'll stop.

ANY REGRETS?
Making old mistakes in new ways. Blargh.

BEST DECISION MADE THIS YEAR?
I know this sounds weird and vague, but there was a very specific moment in Honduras when I knew I had to just let go and let God work.

BIGGEST CHANGE OF THE YEAR?
I went to Europe. I've worked at a real job for over a year. I lost 30 pounds. I think I'm growing up. :)

WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR NEXT YEAR?
Not much planned yet.

WHAT ARE YOUR GOALS FOR NEXT YEAR?
Keep working on my running goals, become more active in my field, re-evaluate ministry involvement and try some new things, become a trophy wife... ;)

Here's to 2009! Health, happiness, and all kinds of good things to you and yours.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from me and mine to you and yours. :)

And because this can never really go well...Feel free to add your own caption to this one.

Christmas cookies

Everyone needs a friend.

Cookie recipe from the Pioneer Woman.

Do not lose heart

I'm sitting here in my office on a Saturday afternoon, eyes swollen and red, tear tracks down my face, nose stuffy, and my heart broken.

I just came from the funeral of Dr. John Thompson, Professor of History at OC and a truly extraordinary man. I think I heard of Dr. Thompson before I even heard of OC. My youth minister adored him and told stories of his big hands and booming laugh and storytelling lectures that would enthrall students. Since I was a student here, and I found out recently for the past 20 years, his health has been pretty bad. His body ravaged by diabetes, kidney failure, and other health problems.

But it seemed as his body withered his spirit flourished. I think there are actually very few great teachers in the world, but Dr. Thompson certainly was one of them. Oh, to sit at his feet for another class or two or twenty. He was such a scholar. And he loved what he did. Stories abound of him padding around campus in house slippers, being rolled in his wheel chair up the big hill to the history building, and even delivering lectures from his hospital beds via speaker phone. He loved what he did, and he was outstanding at what he did.

There are people who love what they do and throw their hearts into it, and people who do enough to get by. Lately I've been having this crisis of conscience about my job. I love what I do, where I work, and the people I work with. And while that is a blessing that I know many people don't have, it puts you in such a vulnerable place. The more you love something, the more susceptible you are to it breaking your heart.

Even at Oklahoma Christian University, some days the faculty can be arrogant, the students can have bad attitudes, the staff can be apathetic and the administration can be distant (I myself have fallen into all those categories). And those days break my heart, because Satan makes me doubt that what I believe and am throwing my heart and career into is all for naught.

But then I am brought back to the truth on days like today, looking around an auditorium of hundreds of people from this dear community mourning the loss of a friend who stood for all the good we work towards. Dr. Thompson could have had a great job at another university with more money and prestige. He could have just retired when his health took a downturn, rather than joyfully and uncomplaining continuing to serve our campus. And I know over the years he must have had his heart broken, because he so freely offered it to all of us who crossed his path.

So although my heart is broken, I'm praying that it will be broken open to this community that I love and I will one day be able to in some small way leave a legacy like Dr. Thompson.

I'll leave you with the verse that Dr. Thompson left for all of us:

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. -II Corinthians 4:16-18

Little things

Sometimes it's the little things that can turn around a craptastic week.

Like my boss bringing a chair masseuse into the office as a Christmas surprise.

Or finding a fantastically 80s-rific picture of me and my cousin.


Or eating a Christmas Cadbury creme egg.


Yep, sometimes it's the little things.

Kids at Christmas

A few weeks ago I heard this story on NPR about how the USPS lets people come and open letters to Santa they receive at Christmas so people can choose to fulfill children's wishes. The program has been going on for over 20 years apparently, and they interviewed one man who had participated for almost that long.

He noted the change in children's requests over the years. When he first said that, I thought "Oh, kids are probably asking for more and more high dollar, high tech toys now", but instead he commented on how often now children are asking for the necessities of life, such as clothes, shoes, coats, and school supplies.

It really broke my heart. Christmas is a great time to be a kid, and they shouldn't have to ask Santa for the things that they need day to day. The whole world is telling them all the toys they should want and all they're asking for is what they shouldn't have to ask for, anyway.

Some friends at church offered to financially sponsor a child if someone else could shop for them, as they don't have time. So I volunteered, as I am in an opposite situation- little money, plenty of time. :) They let me pick the child out and I chose a six year old kid who only asked for a coat and shoes. And so I will pick out those things, but also something that will hopefully make his eyes light up and let him feel like a kid who can just enjoy this special season.

It's been a tough year economically for our country and has especially hit those with little financial room to spare. If you can, consider finding an angel tree program or something similar and find a kid asking for just what they need to get buy, and give them even more than they're hoping for.

*Image from www.postsecret.com

A Tender OK Christmas

From the Oklahoma Capitol building:

Christmas grab bag

And since I don't know what to write... you get a vlog showing you my super cool Christmas gift from the party I went to Sunday. Don't you love the screen shot there? :)


Christmas grab bag from Ann W on Vimeo.

Reaping what you sow

"Am I sowing to the Spirit or sowing to the flesh,
I'm doing one or the other all the time...

And just like a farmer goes out to his field and sows a seed into the ground
Whatever he sows, that he will reap, whatever he plants, that will spring forth.

In the very same way, whatever seeds I'm sowing into my heart, it's guaranteed that I will reap the fruit of what I sow into the garden of my heart."

-Justin Rizzo, Indwelling Spirit

Lately this verse of this part of this song has been knocking around in my head and I can't seem to get it out. It's like one of those movies where the foreshadowing words literally echo across the walls and haunt the afflicted person. It's even worse when God does it, I assure you.

There is a beautiful tree on the corner at the end of my block. It's big and beautiful, and during the fall it was the most stunning shade of yellow. It truly took my breath away every time I saw it (yes, I am that sentimental). And despite the graciously prolonged fall that we had in Oklahoma this year, it still felt too soon that the leaves blew off and now it stands bare. And it will be that way until probably April. Same tree, different season.

I have felt very spiritually frustrated lately. Spring, summer, fall were such rich seasons for me spiritually, and I felt I could see changes day to day in growth and maturity. Then like that first cold slam of winter wind the season changed. And while I try to encourage myself to remember that winter is the time of unseen growth, I'm still frustrated.

I feel like it's a time of gritty faith. It's cold, and I feel bare and vulnerable and stagnant. My prayers feel hollow, worship feels empty, and community feels shallow. But I'm begrudgingly trusting that whatever spiritual seeds that were sown throughout the year are growing somewhere. White knuckle faith still counts as faith, right?

It's a season. And even winter has its moments of reprieve and beauty. And ya know what... spring will come again, and I am choosing to believe in faith that what has been sown will bloom.

Ready for Christmas!

I LOVE THE CHRISTMAS SEASON! I'm one of those who believes Christmas is fair game starting November 1st. Christmas movies are fair game post-Thanksgiving. Since yesterday I have been reveling in Christmas music and decorations, and am so pumped for what I'm sure with be truly the most wonderful time of the year! So in honor of open Christmas season, here's a little blog filler for you.

1) EGG NOG OR HOT CHOCOLATE?
Yes please! Hot nog! :)

2) DOES SANTA WRAP PRESENTS OR JUST SIT THEM UNDER THE TREE?
Santa sets presents under the tree, sans wrapping.

3) COLORED LIGHTS ON THE TREE OR WHITE?
Colored!

4) WHO DO YOU WISH YOU COULD SEE AT CHRISTMAS?
I'm very blessed to see a lot of people I love at Christmas. It'd be great to see them all, but I'm thankful already.

5) WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOLIDAY DISH (EXCLUDING DESSERT)?
This is hard! Probably my aunt Annie's amazing rolls.

6) WHEN DO YOU PUT YOUR CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS UP?
Beginning of November is fair game, thankyouverymuch. :)

7) FAVORITE HOLIDAY MEMORY AS A CHILD?
I can't peg just one memory.

8) WHEN AND HOW DID YOU LEARN THE TRUTH ABOUT SANTA
I really have no idea.

9) DO YOU OPEN A GIFT ON CHRISTMAS EVE?
The White family has always done things differently since we generally drove at least 6 hours on Christmas to be with family. The immediate family always opens all gifts from each other on Christmas Eve.

10) HOW DO YOU DECORATE YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE?
Colored lights and family ornaments.

11) SNOW....LOVE IT OR HATE IT?
Love it when I don't have to be anywhere and I can just look at it through the window or play in it. Hate hate hate it to drive on.

12) CAN YOU ICE SKATE?
Not well...

13) DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR FAVORITE GIFT?
I remember one year I got a Mickey Mouse watch that played music. That was pretty awesome. :)

14) WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING ABOUT THE HOLIDAYS FOR YOU?
Good tidings of comfort and joy... Meditating on thankfulness and the incarnation.

15) WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOLIDAY DESSERT?
So hard! Sweet potato casserole. If it has marshmallows, it's a dessert. :)

16) WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOLIDAY TRADITION?
Easy! The 24 hour "The Christmas Story" marathon on TV! We have to watch it at least 3 times.

18) WHICH DO YOU PREFER: GIVING OR RECEIVING?
Giving, for sure.

19) WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CHRISTMAS SONG?
So impossible! "Baby It's Cold Outside" is a current fave for cuteness, "Breath of Heaven" is very powerful, as is "Come, O Come Emmanuel." I absolutely can't choose. I love Christmas music.

20) ONE THING THAT UPSETS YOU AROUND CHRISTMAS TIME?
Thinking about people who spend the holidays alone

21) SOMETHING YOU'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS CHRISTMAS?
Starbucks caramel apple spice, festive feelings of the holidays, seeing people I love, watching Christmas movies and singing Christmas songs

22) FAVORITE CHRISTMAS MOVIE?
I love Christmas movies! A Christmas Story, White Christmas, Elf, It's a Wonderful Life... oh the list goes on!!!!

I love me some Christmas!