Answers

You asked, I will answer.

Leah asks- Your all time favorite book?

I will exclude the Bible, and name one fiction and one non-fiction.

Fiction- East of Eden by John Steinbeck. Love love love this book. I've probably read it at least five times. Amazing storytelling, deep symbolism.

Non-fiction- Prayer- Finding the Heart's True Home by Richard Foster. Revitalized my prayer life, which changed so much about my ministry and relationship with God.

For a complete list of my all time favorites, check out the amazon widget in the left hand column.

Do you ever see yourself going back to Brazil in the future?

I would love to go back to visit, and think I will. But I don't have any plans or a strong desire to live there again. It would have to be a very unique and good situation for me to consider moving back (living, working, etc).

Holly asks, What is your favorite memory of living overseas?

This isn't a specific moment, but both in Japan and Brazil, the most precious memories are those with church members. It was amazing to me to witness how the Holy Spirit and bond of Christ can unify people despite culture, language, and experience. God is good!

Amanda asks, What is the biggest obstacle for church growth in Brazil?

Disclaimer that I'm giving my opinion from what I've seen, not necessarily in the places where I've lived, but in missions in general. It seems to me that a critical problem in missions (typical North Americans going elsewhere) is a dependence upon foreign leadership and money. Sometimes it's just a product of the system, in other cases it seems that some missionaries create that type of monopoly.

I would like to see more focus put on training native church members in leadership and letting them "own" and grow their churches. The mission churches I respect most and see as most healthy are those where the native church members are entrusted with responsibility and given freedom to lead.

If you could do absolutely any job, anywhere in the world, what would it be?

Hmm, I had to think about this one. First of all, I want to say how much I love my current job. And I'm not just flattering my bosses/co-workers who read the blog. :) I find myself often talking about how much I love what I do and the people I work with. I never imagined I could like a job as much as I like mine.

That said, call me a glutton for punishment but I still feel some draw to ministry. I'm not sure what that would look like, but some areas I have a great deal of interest in are hospital chaplaincy, counseling, writing, or academia.

Great questions! Sorry it took me so long to answer. I actually did this last week, but then blogger ate it. :(

One last chance- if you have questions, leave them in the comments and I'll answer with a quicker turnaround than this time. :)

525,600 Minutes

525,600 minutes
525,000 moments so dear
525,600 minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights? in sunsets? in midnights? in cups of coffee?
In inches? in miles? in laughter? in strife?
In 525,600 minutes, how do you measure a year in the life?
How about love? Measure in love. Seasons of love.

Yesterday marked a year ago that I left Brazil. In some ways it seems like a lifetime ago, but at the same time I remember the joy of friends and heartache of leaving like it was yesterday.

Going to Brazil was one of the best decisions I've made, honestly. It brought me back to life after my illness-- physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It challenged me and brought me more fun than I could have imagined.

I was worried that yesterday was going to be a bummy day. When I left Brazil, I was fully intending to move back within six months, so in some ways I feel like a lot of my feelings and relationships are unresolved. When I think of my beloved friends there I haven't seen in a year now, my heart still pangs.

But God is good. Yesterday I was able to spend time with some people I love dearly, and soak up the joy of being where I am now.

Every time I think I know where the road is headed, it seems to take a turn that I didn't expect. But I wouldn't trade it for the world. :)

It’s time now to sing out, though the story never ends
Let's celebrate remember a year in the life of friends.
Remember the love.. Measure in love... Seasons of love!

Plane Crash in São Paulo

Some of you might have seen the news today about a major airplane accident in São Paulo, Brazil. This hit me a little close to home on several levels. For one, the flight was one from Porto Alegre to São Paulo, a flight which I took when I went on my awesome vineyard vacation. There but by the grace of God go I, huh?

To help illustrate what a dangerous situation this is, the Congonhas airport is in the smack middle of São Paulo, one of the largest and most cram packed metropolis areas in the world. Taking off and landing in that airport is nerve racking because you are literally flying right next to skyscrapers and apartment high rise buildings. The fact that more people weren't injured is a miracle.

So I was saddened and disturbed to hear of the accident, but then by chance today I got to talk to one of my dearest friends in Brazil, Thiago. He is finishing his residency at a hospital in São Paulo, and apparently the survivors, 10 of them, were brought to his hospital where he was working in the ER today. When I talked to him he'd just gotten off work and was still shaken and shocked by the whole thing. He said they were suffering mostly burns and were all in very serious condition.

Every day tragedies are reported on the news, but some days they hit very close to home. Reminds you of how small our world is.

Normalcy

Hello Blogland,

I realize it's been a while since I've written. For me, at least. 5 days between postings would be probably a 1000% increase in frequency for some of my friends, but for me it's pretty bad. :) I've just felt thoroughly uninspired to write, which is too bad because I really have a lot I could write about.

The weekend before last I went to Texas once more to visit my favorite Canadianette, Pamela. I met Pamela in Brazil last year. She lived in Itu for 2 years, so we understand each other and our experiences there in a way few can. She was down from the northernlands to take a short course at ACU, and I figured this may be as geographically close as we are for a while, so I took the chance to visit. And it was wonderful! She wrote on her own blog about the excitement of my flat tire, so you can read the story and see the pictures there. Pamela's going to Brazil this week and I am inexpressibly jealous. I have been incredibly blessed by her since we met!


What else is going on... the cat and I are doing fine. She has taken control of our relationship, with me answering to her beck and meows. But I still like her. :)


I passed the teacher certification test. Believe it on not, on the general academic test I actually got a perfect score on the math area and didn't pass the writing. Go fig. Now I'm looking for a teaching job.

This is a strange time of the year, because I feel like I should be getting ready to go to Brazil. It's even harder to see my friends getting ready to go to Brazil, to the very churches I worked with. I never wrote too much on the blog about deciding not to go back. The primary reason I didn't move to Brazil is because I was so weary of uprooting and moving. I just wanted a nice, "normal" life. I've never been a rolling stone in my heart or personality, so all the moving I've done in the past 3 years has really worn me down. But I miss Brazil. So much I can hardly stand it sometimes. I miss my friends, the church, the lifestyle, the food, the language... and I don't know if I made the right decision. I don't really doubt my decision; I just wish there were some way to make it all work. But right now there's not, and I am okay with that and happy where I am and what I'm doing. When I decided not to go, I was afraid I would become bored quickly and regret my decision, but honestly I haven't. I almost feel guilty for that. Almost, not quite. Bloom where you're planted, right? And I happen to really like where I'm planted right now.

Well, that's a lot of what's going on with me. Just living my "normal" life. :) What's going on with you?

Hard decision

This is a letter I sent today to my closest friends in Brazil. It is the hardest thing I've ever written (and I don't mean the Portuguese, although I think it's the first time I've posted in Portugese on the blog).

Ola, meus amados amigos,

Eu espero que esse ano novo seja bom pra vocês, e vai continuar a ser otimo.

Eu falei com vocês sobre a possibilidade de eu poder morar no Brasil. Eu tenho orado muito e tenho pedido conselhos dos meus amigos aqui que me conheçam há muito tempo, e eu acho que é melhor pra mim ficar nos EEUU agora. Com certeza eu vou voltar a visitar o Brasil.

Meu carinho e meu amor para meus amigos e a igreja, e a cultura brasileira não mudavam nem um pouquinho. Isso é a decisão mais difícil que já tomei na minha vida, e foi tomado com muitas lágrimas. E quem sabe a futura. Eu tenho muito tempo ainda pra morar no Brasil. Brasil está no meu sangue agora. :)

Eu acredito que isso é a vontade de Deus pra mim agora. Eu amo vocês com todo meu coração. Eu espero que vocês orem pra mim e me apoiem nesta decisão, e estou orando que todos vcs podem achar a vontade de Deus pra suas vidas, também.

Com todo amor do meu coração,

ann

Basically it says that I've decided that I'm not moving back to Brazil. When I left I believed that's what would happen, but after a lot of praying and seeking advice I've decided it's not what would be best right now. It is without a doubt the hardest decision I've made, and my heart has completely broken since deciding and now having to tell my dear friends there. I'm dreading the next few days as I receive their responses (or lack thereof). Please pray that they know my heart and my love for them and that they can support me in this. I know they will, but I still feel awful.

I'm living in OKC and looking for a job (waiting to hear on one that I really really want). I'm staying with some wonderful friends and am blessed to be with friends who love and support me. Just wanted to let blog-land know what's going on.

Democracy in Action

Unless you are absurdly or unusually informed, you probably don´t know that today was election day in Brazil. Voting is mandatory for all citizens ages 18-60, I believe, unless you are over 200 kilometers away from your registered voting station (and I´m sure there are other excuses). So, it was a busy day for Brazil in general. These were the major elections-- president, governors, congress and senate, and some other office.

Political campaigning is very different here. It is anything but subtle. For the past month (at least), everytime I go down town I´ve been bombarded with leaflets and handouts and all kinds of gaudy advertising. Each candidate has a number, and when you vote you must enter that number into the machine from memory, so they work hard to make their number seen.

My friend Ivan wanted me to see how this worked, so he invited me to go with him to vote after church. As we neared the voting hall, this is what the street looked like--

These are all political leaflets in some kind of last ditch effort to advertise.

I was allowed to enter with Ivan as he voted, and for a country sometimes known for it´s chaos, it´s really quite advanced in this issue. It´s all electronic, you just go and punch your numbers in an electric machine and leave. It even pops up the picture of the candidate you enter so you can be sure you have the right one.

I found this leaflet on the ground and and tried to get Ivan to vote for him, but he refused.

In the end, it looks like Lula, the current president, will be re-elected. Most people I know are not happy about that. Lula is a north-easterner, and Paulistas (people from São Paulo) were voting rooting for a man named Alckmin (the former mayor of São Paulo, I believe). We´ll see. I´m not too devistated... I am kind of used to disappointing elections. ;)

Como se chama???

Last night I had thought of a blog topic, but then this morning couldn´t remember. Now I do!

One interesting thing that I´ve noticed the past three months is that people here have found inventive and imaginative ways to mispronounce my name. Now, my name is really quite simple. Ann Marie White. Simple. Very. Even the Japanese could pronounce my name. Except for the "Ho-whito" part. :)

When I first came to Brazil, my team thought it was funny that people pronounce my name "awhn." In fact, Meredith (who´s name is even funnier in Portuguese) still calls me "Awhnie" at times. But by and large, my name was largely left in tact.

Not this time!

I am called a number of ways. Some people call me Ann. Some people call me Annie, and some people call me "Uhh-nee", for lack of a better what to write it. This one sweet lady found out my name was Ann Marie (Ana Maria here, very Brazilian), but when she tries to say it in English she calls me "Annie Mary". It´s really quite funny. :)

Ali Gonçalves came down here and started the Ana Branca revolution, which is Ann White translated into Portuguese. Lots of people call me Ana now. Generally, I used to be so against when foreigners came to America and changed their names to something super-American like Bob or Susie (I experienced this a lot with the Asian students I worked with at OC), but now I understand. It´s kind of better to be called a different name than to have your name hacked up. But in my defense, Ana is basically Ann.

So I´m Ana Branca a lot. Then this turned into Ana Branca Franga, because my dear friend Jandira started calling me Franga... she says it´s some slang term from the 70s for a girl. Then she dubbed me Ana Branca Franga da Silva, because she says all Brazilians have like, 7 names (which is totally true), and since White is a common name in the US, da Silva is very common in Brazil.

So there you go. I am Ana Maria Branca Franga da Silva.

Also, I found this toy on myspace. I thought it was a cool way to display a lot of pictures. Enjoy! Or don´t, it´s really up to you. ;)

Say no to speedo

I´ve been planning a trip to the beach with my friends in a couple of months, and today the thought struck me that some of the men might wear speedos. I can´t tell you how disturbing this is to me. I really think I´ll never recover if I see my male friends in speedos. Not that they´re ugly by any means, if you´ve noticed in my pictures on here Brazilians are exceptionally beautiful. But a speedo? Dude, please. I know this is a cultural issue that I have to get over... but it will take an act of God, I´m pretty sure. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me... even exposure to speedos.

For those Simpsons fans out there, I would like to recall the episode where the Simpsons go to Brazil and Homer wears a speedo. He actually wears like, 4. Great moment. :)

Feliz dia de ficar*!

Last night was a fun night to celebrate my not leaving Brazil for a while longer, because yesterday is when I was originally scheduled to fly out. So I had the wonderful privledge to have dinner with some of my favorite people here and in the world.

These guys are my family here and no matter where I go or what I do in life, I will always carry them in my hearts.



Marúsia, Ann, Jandira

Aníbal, Ivan, Leandro, Marúsia, Ann, Jandira-- I love these guys so much!

*This means happy staying day, more or less, although I´m probably missing a preposition or something. :) It´s funny because "ficar" in Brazil also has the same meaning as NCL for your OCers, or when you just randomly make out with someone you have no romantic relationship with. Yay for learning Portuguese!